self love
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My Experience with #NoNewClothes and Slow Fashion Season

Wednesday, 6 October 2021

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The beginning of October marks the end of a long season of slow fashion after the combination of #NoNewClothes, Slow Fashion Season, Secondhand September, so it's time to discuss my experiences with them this year.


 

Seeing as I don’t buy loads of clothes anyway, I set myself the target of not buying secondhand clothes either. A complete ban. There were some caveats: I could swap clothes, I could be given them by friends/family, and basically as long as I didn’t buy them it was fine. And for the most part that worked out pretty well.

 

For the majority of the ban I didn’t acquire any new clothes at all. For the whole of June and July, I got nothing new. I hardly thought about new clothes, apart from when the odd ethical sample sale would come up on Instagram and I had to remind myself there was no point clicking on it ‘just for a browse’ because I couldn’t buy anything anyway. Then, at the beginning of August, a friend of mine who is starting at uni . In the end I took 3 tops (one of which was a vest top to go underneath another one which was mesh) and used the rest as part of a donation drive a refugee support organisation I work with was running at the time. They are now loved in new homes. 



Near the end of the month I then acquired 2 t-shirts new and for free, each through my involvement with an activist/voluntary organisation. This technically breaks my ban as they were both brand new, but I received both within a few days of each other at the very end of #NoNewClothes and. I’ve already worn my Green New Deal Rising t-shirt several times both as part of actions (challenging Kate Osborne MP and Chancellor Rishi Sunak) and in my day to day life – it’s a great top! These t-shirts do make campaigns, actions, and spreading the word about these organisations so much more effective and will definitely make the most out of them. 



Going into the last month of Slow Fashion Season and Secondhand September, and I was pretty set on not getting anymore. But then I got invited to an event by ethical and sustainable brand Birdsong (many people have sung their praises, including Aja Barber, whose opinions we know I trust probably more than anyone in slow fashion circles), to celebrate the launch of their new website. The event was so lovely, not just for the very cool people I met there but also the lush clothes I got to try on. I fell in love with 2 garments in particular: a t-shirt and some gingham trousers. The event attendees received a code to get a free t-shirt from Birdsong so of course I was going to get the one I tried on. After about a week I ordered it, expecting it to take about 3 weeks to arrive (as stated on the website), so I would be technically out of Slow Fashion Season by then (I know, stretching the rules to the max) but it ended up arriving at my house a few days later instead. I have worn it several times already and absolutely adore it. In fact, I’m wearing it as I write this. It’s so soft, comfy, and goes well with lots of garments I already own. It’s definitely one for the long haul.



Later on in the month I took home 2 items that were overflow from a refugee support project I volunteer with. We had way too many clothes than needed and were diving up the leftovers to donate to other charities who may need some. I loved 2 items: a top and a jacket and asked if I could take them home with me as they weren't being used. It's safe to say I have worn the jacket most days since I got it and have worn the top several times too. 


 

So altogether that’s 8 garments I acquired over the course of four months: 3 given to me secondhand by a friend and 2 new given to me by organisations I work/volunteer for during #NoNewClothes, and then another (ethically made) top I bought during after being slightly obsessed with it at a PR event and 2 secondhand items I also got for free during the Slow Fashion Season/Secondhand September. 

 

I may have technically failed these challenges, but to me they are still certainly a success. I reconsidered every time I had the thought of buying something new, thought over my relationships with my clothed again, and rewore some of my absolute favourite outfits. I also found new ways of wearing garments I love and want to make more use out of - like a black mesh drress I adore but want to wear in more casual ways. Turns out it looks great under a pair of green trousers I wear loads! Considering that the average person buys at least one item of mid-priced clothing a week, I have certainly succeeded in drastically lowering my contributions for the linear economy. 



The whole point of these challenges is to get us to look more closely at our clothing consumption and to reconsider if those consumption levels align with our values and how we want workers and the environment to be treated. They’re a means for us to step back and look at how capitalism affects our day to day decisions, and how we perceive our desires and what makes us satisfied. We’re constantly told that commodities will make us happy and the vast majority of the time that is a lie – books may be the only exception here, but that’s just me – and initiatives such as #NoNewClothes are a great way for us to rethink what we’ve been told since birth and find out what we really want/need. 

 

In her book We Need to Talk About Money, Otegha Uwagba discusses how capitalism and patriarchy intersect severely through the beauty and fashion industries. She highlights how ‘[m]odern consumer culture is sustained by a mixture of aspiration and dissatisfaction with the status quo, and the belief that this product or that brand is capable of transforming our lives; capable of making us happier, sexier, richer; capable of allowing us to self-actualise’ and that this was the ‘unsolvable lack’ as described by Anne Helen Petersen. Initiatives like #NoNewClothes teach us all about how to love what we already have and feel great in old clothes. I know having learned about slow fashion for several years now, I now value any clothes that I acquire much more highly, whether they're second or new, they will be cherished so much more now that I'm much more selective with the clothes I own and wear. To me, learning to love the clothes you already own is a great way to loving yourself more, and feeling better in your own skin by rediscovering clothes that make you feel great or trying out new outfits from clothes. It shows us that we can be content with what we already have and that supposed ‘lack’ is not, as we are told constantly by capitalism, ‘unsolvable’, but that it never actually existed in the first place. 




If you like my work and have learned something from it, please consider helping support me (so I have more time to write posts and articles like these!) by buying me a virtual cuppa



 

 

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5 Practices to Implement into Your Self-Care

Friday, 11 December 2020

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 Self-care is necessary at the best of times, but right now it is more important than ever. There are different challenges to our mental health than life pre-pandemic, and we need to adapt and think of new ways to look after ourselves we maybe didn’t have to consider previously.



1. Write a list of everything you need to do


Anyone who knows me in real life will probably know how much of a list person I am. I make daily lists of things to do, and have a huge list on a Google Doc separated into different categories, to help me keep track of different areas of my life (e.g. uni, my blog, other projects, general life things, etc.), and honestly, having these lists helps me so much. 

 

Having everything stuck in my head stresses me out, and leaves me overwhelmed and confused. My making a list of everything I need to do, no matter how small, I dump everything in my mind onto the page (whether paper of digital) and I can think so much more clearly. I guess it’s quite similar to how some people use journaling as a tool to clear their minds. 

 

2. Go outside


Get some Vitamin D! As we’re all spending so much time inside now, this has become much more of a chore or something we have to remind ourselves to do. Even if it’s only to pop to the shops or a five-minute walk around the nearby streets, you’ll be glad to have a change of scene. I think having somewhere to physically be is something we all miss and feel like we took for granted, I know I do. I used to spend most of my days out of the house working in different uni buildings or cafes, and I am definitely going to miss that this year. However, I’m still trying to break up my days with scheduled plans to walks outside, even if it’s just to sit on a bench with a cup of tea for 10 minutes. Brave the cold, get moving and get some fresh air!


3. Cook something from scratch


Cooking is like meditation to me. Whether I’m cooking in silence or having a dance party in the kitchen, the act of putting together something nutritious always calms me down. I’m not sure if there’s some psychological links behind it, but having that process does wonders for me and really helps me unwind and to really do something I love. And you have to eat after, something you may forget to do if that’s the space of mind you’re in, especially as the days blur into one in lockdown. 


4. Speak to friends or family


Just because we’re socially distanced, that shouldn’t mean that we have to be socially distant – if that makes any sense at all? If you’re able to, foster the relationships you cherish and try to stay connected where possible. While we do need time to ourselves, humans are social creatures at heart, and this forced behaviour will take its toll. Wherever possible, we must try to mitigate that. Just remember that if you’re seeing people you don’t live with in person to make sure you’re taking the necessary precautions to protect both yourselves and others and that you’re following the law wherever you are (i.e. standing at least one metre apart if not two metres, wearing masks, unless you have a medical reason not to, and being outside if possible).


5. Fight for change 


Like many others, I believe that activism is a form of self-care. Wellbeing is not an individual thing. It is dependent on us as a collective, and political decisions impact on the wellbeing. A bubble bath is useless if mental health services aren’t properly funded, or if systemic racism is damaging both the mental and physical health of people from ethnic minorities, particularly Black people. Calling for wider systemic change not only seeks to improve overall wellbeing in the immediate term, but also for longer term impact so that future generations can have an improved wellbeing and better mental health than those who have come before them. 

 

In the words of Audre Lorde: ‘Caring for myself is not self-indulgence. It is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare,’ and therefore all acts of self-care, whether acts of sheer survival or of engaging with wider political systems, are acts of defiance and revolt.



If you liked this post you might like: Self-Care is Not Pretty | Rethinking Wellness

 

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Playlist for a Chill Day

Monday, 6 March 2017

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We all love a good relaxing day! Here are some songs to set the mood:


1. Come Back to Nashville - Rusty Clanton cover
2. The Way You Look Tonight – Fred Astaire
3. I Knew You Once – dodie
4. So This is Love – from the film Cinderella
5. Sagittarius – Phoebe Green
6. An Unsolved Mystery – Melanie Baker
7. You Make Loving Fun – Fleetwood Mac
8. Hey There Delilah – Tessa Violet cover
9. True Colours – Tom Odell
10. Walk in the Sun - McFly
11. Samson – Regina Spektor
12. Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want -  The Smiths
13. Panic Chord – Gabrielle Aplin
14.  Day Before You Came – ABBA
15. You’ve Got a Friend – James Taylor
16. Drive – Oh Wonder
17. Atlantis - Seafret
18. So Close – from the film Enchanted
19. Holes - Layla
20. Wasting My Younger Years – London Grammar

Hope you enjoyed! This post is in collaboration with Laura over at Blossom of Hope. Keep an eye out for her post about self-care which will be going up tomorrow!


Jemima x



If you liked this post you might like: 5 Ways to Relax This Weekend

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5 Ways to Relax This Weekend

Friday, 22 July 2016

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Since my exams have finished, I’ve had no sort of pressure on me, which has been great! It’s allowed me to relax a lot, whether by a method I have sworn by for years or have recently discovered. I thought I’d share these with you!


1. Have a long bath


Oldest relaxation tip in the book right? There’s a reason for that. Run yourself a warm bath, maybe with some candles around it and a bath bomb. I like to watch a history documentary when I’m in the bath but then again that’s probably just me being a complete nerd. I’m also one of the dangerous people who drink tea in the bath; I haven’t spilt any tea yet but I don’t think it can be that  long.

Source

2. Playing an instrument


This will only work for specific people, but if you have an interest in it then go for it! As I think I’ve mentioned before, I play the violin and it helps me a lot. If I’m feeling a little overwhelmed I’ll get out my violin and play some of my most loved pieces. 

Source

During the exam season, however, I started to teach myself to play the piano. Whenever I got bored or fed up with revision, I’d take to the piano and try to perfect the easy pieces I’d discovered in the back of a cupboard somewhere. My family may not have appreciated hearing the same 3 pieces over and over and again, but I genuinely found that it helped me forget about exam stress and wind down in the evening.

3. Take advantage of the summer weather!


As the UK is experiencing a bit of a heatwave right now, why not go outside? Take a book into the garden and sunbathe. Go for a walk somewhere - discover a new place near you. Give yourself some time out to think. 



4. Or stay inside and have a lazy day


Catch up on (or rewatch) your favourite TV show in your pyjamas with a blanket and some cereal. Find reruns of a hilariously bad old show or a classic like FRIENDS. Binge-watch some films. If you write, write. Do something creative. All of these can also be used when applied to step 3 too.


5. Find a friend and just talk.


FaceTime an old friend you haven’t seen in ages or someone you’ve seen that day and talk things over. Time with friends always relaxes me, no matter what the conversation topic.


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My Flaws

Wednesday, 6 April 2016

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I don’t like the way my body dips in between by hips and my leg joint. I think it makes the curve of my body look disjointed and uneven.

I don’t like the shape of my big toes. I think they look really manly and unfeminine.

I don’t like the way my cheeks crinkle under my eyes when I smile. It looks weird and makes my cheeks look puffy.




I don’t like my knobbly knees. They just look a bit odd in the summer or whenever I’m not covering them up.

I don’t like my thighs. They rub together and jiggle when I walk.

But I love that dip between my hips and leg joint. It’s there because of my hips, which make me feel sexy if I’m alone and wiggle them about and swish them to and fro. 

I love the shape of my big toes. They’re my dad’s big toes and remind me of him and of all the other family members who have these toes. They’re a sign of all the people I’m descended from and who have evolved and reproduced to pass on these toes to me, which is pretty incredible.

I like the crinkle that forms under my eyes when I smile. It’s there because I’m smiling, and if I’m smiling I’m probably happy. I will never, never, resent being happy.



I like my knobbly knees: if I straighten my leg they can make the shape of a smiley face. How can someone not find that amusing?

I like my wobbly thighs. They’re fun to jiggle about and stop my phone from falling in the toilet when I drop it.

I love my flaws. They show that I’m not perfect, as no one is. They remind me I’m human and that I can make mistakes. They are parts of me that make me. I love them because they are a part of me. I love them because they are me.

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If you liked this post you might like: Being Me


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My Past Selves

Monday, 7 December 2015

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My 16-year-old self has more spots than my 14-year-old self, or even my 15-year-old self. But she is more comfortable with a face full of harsh, red blemishes than the 14-year-old who would sweat and panic over one tiny zit. It wouldn’t even be classed as a zit; in reality they were slightly discoloured hills on my skin, barely able to be awarded the title of red - of a spot. 

My 16-year-old self sometimes walks around make-up free, despite her pock-marked face! My 13-year-old self would sometimes do the same, but she felt more shy about her perfect skin than my 16-year-old self’s varied one. My 14-year-old self had thin thighs that she felt were “too skinny” and  a relatively flat chest. Now my 16-year-old self has boobs that jiggle when she dances and thighs that wiggle when she walks. 

My 13-year-old self was insecure about her likes and dislikes - that things that made her her, she thought that her reading habit and bookish obsessions would cause people to think less of her. But now her 16-year-old self is proud of her hobbies and her colourful bookshelf and will usually be happy to share the things she has written, in the hope that someone will enjoy reading them as she has enjoyed writing them.

But my 16-year-old self is still secure. She still has days when she is scared and doubts her self worth; she still feels conscious about changing for PE in case anyone looks disparagingly upon her body. She is confident but still has insecurities. She knows everyone has insecurities now matter how confident they may seem - and that is what makes her confident. She has accepted herself for who she is and I am proud of her for that. 

However, that doesn’t mean that I am not proud of my other selves; the spotless 13-year-old, the 14-year-old with “too skinny” legs, and the 15-year-old who felt lost and out of place, with no sense of direction. I am proud of them.

I am proud of my 13-year-old self for letting herself become more confident around people.

I am proud of my 14-year-old self for achieving the feeling of security and bliss around the friends I still love to bits today, for discovering more of her passions and letting others know about them. 

I am proud of my 15-year-old self in so many ways. Having recently been her, her troubles are still fresh in my mind. The heartbreak my 14-year-old self felt at having to leave my home rippled into my 15-year-old self’s thoughts. She didn’t feel right - she was uncomfortable. She felt empty for a while until she took the time to glue herself back together, piece by piece. I am proud of her for triumphing over the troubles my past selves struggled against and I want to congratulate her for that.

Now, all that I hope is that my 16-year-old self, and all my selves to come, will do them proud.







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5 things to do when you're feeling down

Friday, 6 November 2015

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1. Have a shower

Get yourself cleaned. Spend as long as you want standing under the water. Sing as loud as you can to whatever song it is that makes you smile.

2. Get changed into clean clothes

Wear something nice, that you feel comfortable in. Just make sure you don’t put on a clean pair of pyjamas on, that will just make you want to go back to bed.

3. Eat something reasonably healthy

As much as you may want to binge eat ice-cream: don’t. It’ll just make you feel worse. Eat something else. It doesn’t have to be all that great for you, just as long as it’s not junk food and has some sort of goodness in it.

4. Go for a walk

Clear your mind and listen to the sounds of the world. Go wherever your feet take you - just as long as you know your way home again!

5. Make yourself a cup of tea

Tea makes everything better.
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5 things to tell yourself each morning

Friday, 23 October 2015

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1. I am brilliant, even if not everyone recognises that

2. I can do this

3. I am worth it

4. My life decisions cannot be made by anyone but me

5. I believe in you

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p.s. 60th post!! How did we get to this many? Thank you everyone for reading and supporting me!



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5 little steps to loving yourself

Friday, 7 August 2015

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      1.  Wake up at a time that isn’t too late and isn’t too early, whenever possible.

I find that, when I don’t have to be anywhere particular,  and I lie in bed for hours on end, I tend to feel groggier and be less productive throughout the day. So, whenever I have free days (weekends and during school holidays) I try to set my alarm between 8 and 9am. This way I feel more refreshed and have more time to accomplish little tasks.

2.   Eat fresh fruit and drink lots of water.

Binge eating strawberries is one of my favourite things. Ever.

3.  Look in the mirror every day and compliment yourself.

When the words start coming from your own mouth you’ll start to believe them.

4.  Do things that make you feel happy, not what someone else tells you that you have to do.

Choose your career so that it goes along with what you love. Have hobbies that inspire and excite you. Live life through the things you love.

5.  Wear clothes that make you feel good.

So what if your top went out of fashion a few years ago? If you love it, wear it. You’ll rock anything that way.



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